


Wind in Dry Grass

by voleuse



Category: Harry Potter - Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-08-18
Updated: 2004-08-18
Packaged: 2017-10-05 23:59:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/47435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/voleuse/pseuds/voleuse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><em>Our dried voices are quiet and meaningless</em>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wind in Dry Grass

**Author's Note:**

> AU, set after _Order of the Phoenix_. Title, summary, and headings adapted from T.S. Eliot's _The Hollow Men_.

_i. death's other kingdom_

Bella's hex hits him in the chest, and Sirius falls, falls, falls...

...and opens his eyes to a new place, which doesn't fit any philosopher's idea of heaven or hell, as first of all, he seems to be sprawled on a cellar floor. Second of all, his chest hurts like hell.

Third of all, Remus is kneeling in front of him, hands bleeding, and tears in his eyes.

_ii. we whisper together_

It had taken Remus months of preparation. The texts, formerly so forbidden, were obtainable now, for the right price, the right word.

And the blood of innocence, and his own.

He didn't ask the hag where the blood had come from, and he almost didn't care. Innocent blood is easily found, these days.

This ritual was more complex than the charms he had learned in school, more complex than the wards Moody had drilled into them, once upon a time. It was something akin to things they were never allowed to practice, let alone know about, in school.

His conscience pulled at him throughout the process, even until he was seated in a salt-and-blood circle, palms slashed, and will burning with pain.

He took a moment to hope that this burst of magic wouldn't be noticed, just one flash of darkness in the midst of a city overrun with wizardry.

Then Sirius fades into his vision, and he stops thinking anything at all.

_iii. paralysed force_

Sirius coughs once, then twice. The world is slowly coming back into focus, and his fingers and toes are tingling. He rises from the floor, painstakingly propping his elbows on the dirt, and turns to face Remus fully. "Remus," he begins, "what the hell--"

Remus blinks, then raises a finger to his lips, indicating silence.

"Remus, what--"

Remus' hand is pressed over his mouth in a second, but it's the fear in Remus' eyes that quells Sirius' questions.

Sirius stills, attentive, and Remus whispers an answer in reward.

"They'll kill us if we're found. You're too well known."

Sirius sags back to the ground.

He's used to waiting by now.

_iv. not lost, violent souls_

They sit in silence for what seems like hours.

Sirius gathers himself together, reacquainting himself with his body, yet again. He tries not to look at Remus, because that will only lead him to ask more questions, or something more that he can't risk if it risks Remus as well.

So he waits, the sound of their breathing racketing harshly in his ears.

In time, something of a pattern stirs his attention. He looks up, and Remus is staring at him, his lips moving soundlessly, words escaping as exhalations.

As the air warms, indicating sunrise, Remus' mouthings become whispers, until Sirius can comprehend the inexorable litany.

"Harry. Kingsley. George. Frank. Molly. Hermione. Ginny. Tonks. Fred. Arthur. Moody. Ron. Percy. Neville. Alice. Dumbledore. Hagrid. Minerva. Lily. James."

The last two names strike Sirius like a tidal wave.

It isn't a litany that Remus chants.

It's a dirge.

_v. rats' feet over broken glass_

"Peter."

The last name startles Sirius, makes him twitch. He can't help but speak. "Remus--"

Remus meets his eyes. "I killed him. Four months ago, on the full moon. They couldn't tell one wolf from another, and I ripped his throat out." He grins like the predator he is.

"Why did you..." Sirius swallows, tries to moisten the desert of his throat. "Why did you do it?"

And Remus lets loose the words that Sirius has been dreading.

"Because it's his fault, Sirius." Someone screams outside, perhaps down the street, but Remus doesn't so much as blink. "They're all dead because of him."

_vi. in our dry cellar_

Sirius creeps forward, feeling the day trickle on, but he dares not move more quickly.

He guesses it might be noon by the time he's by Remus' side.

Remus doesn't protest when he takes him into his arms. Holds him like a child, until the tears withheld finally track their way over the scars on Remus' face.

Sirius cries with him.

The dead mourning for the dead.

_vii. remember us -- if at all_

It's a while before their tears dry, but Sirius is content to wait. When he feels Remus' body loosen, he lets slip his question.

"Is there anything we can do, Remus?"

Remus turns his head, looks up at Sirius with confusion. "Do?"

"To stop V--" He catches the terror in Remus' eyes and amends. "To stop You-Know-Who."

Remus shakes his head, almost hissing his answer. "There's too many of them, the Order is gone, one person alone can't do anything, it's too overwhelming--"

Sirius lays a finger on Remus' lips, and manages a smile. "Not alone, Remus."

Remus' wand lies on the floor. Sirius reaches, picks it up as Remus draws back.

Hands it to him, and relishes the warmth in Remus' hands as their fingers brush.

He watches hope blossom in Remus' eyes, and repackages his question appropriately.

"What will we do?"

And they begin to plan.


End file.
